officialunitedstates:

can’t wait till it’s winter again so I can get my year supply of carrots off the neighborhood kids’ snowmen

64kbps:

soulja boy tell em. im too shy

    Cosmo:Fuck, marry, kill... New Girl edition.
    Jake Johnson:I would fuck Schmidt, I would kill Schmidt, and I would marry Schmidt.

ciggawet:

*swipes debit card*
*sweats profusely*
*purchase goes through*
me: God is good all the time
Cashier: all the time God is good

jaimielannister:

when you clean your glasses and they go from like 280p to 1080p 

lassiessternumbush:

girls don’t like boys girls like fake psychics and cars dubbed the blueberry